{"id":505,"date":"2026-07-02T10:07:24","date_gmt":"2026-07-02T02:07:24","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/smilewithdrmel.com\/?p=505"},"modified":"2026-07-02T10:07:24","modified_gmt":"2026-07-02T02:07:24","slug":"mfds-diaries-episode-1-why-im-doing-this-to-myself","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/smilewithdrmel.com\/?p=505","title":{"rendered":"MFDS Diaries \u2014 Episode 1: Why I’m Doing This to Myself"},"content":{"rendered":"

Okay. So I’m actually doing this. I’m sitting here writing the very first entry of what I’m calling my MFDS Diaries<\/em>, because if I’m going to put myself through this, I might as well document the chaos \u2014 the doubts, the late nights, the “why did I sign up for this” moments \u2014 and hopefully some of you reading this will feel a little less alone if you’re standing where I was a few months ago.<\/p>\n

So let’s rewind a bit. Why MFDS Part 1? Why now?<\/p>\n

The Spark<\/h3>\n

I’ve been working as a GP dentist for about a year now. A whole year of clinic life \u2014 routine days, familiar rhythms, comfortable-ish. And then I got posted to OMFS and Paeds in hospital, and something just… shifted. Being in that environment, seeing the level of thinking, the depth of cases, the way specialists approached problems \u2014 it lit something up in me that I didn’t even realise had gone a bit quiet.<\/p>\n

I’ve always had this pull towards improving myself, pushing past whatever level I’m currently at. It’s never a loud thing, more like a background hum that’s always running. But that hospital posting turned the volume up. I left those postings thinking: I want more of this. I want to know more, understand more, be more.<\/em><\/p>\n

And honestly? I also just missed the grind. I’d been coasting a little \u2014 not in a bad way, just comfortable \u2014 and some part of me was craving a real challenge again. The kind that makes your brain hurt a bit in a good way. MFDS felt like exactly that kind of challenge.<\/p>\n

The Doubts (There Were a Lot)<\/h3>\n

Here’s the part I have to be honest about, because I think this is the part most people skip when they talk about exams like this: I was scared I didn’t have the time.<\/p>\n

I’m working full time. Most days I come home exhausted \u2014 like, “lie on the couch and stare at the ceiling” exhausted, not “sit down and open a textbook” exhausted. So when the idea of MFDS first crossed my mind, my very next thought was: how am I supposed to study on top of all this?<\/em><\/p>\n

I didn’t sign up right away. I sat with the idea for a while. It wasn’t until the end of December 2025 that I finally thought, okay, maybe I should actually do this. And even then \u2014 full disclosure \u2014 I had absolutely no idea how much study time this exam actually demands. I found that out later (a story for another episode, trust me).<\/p>\n

But here’s a little rule I live by, and it’s carried me through more decisions than I can count: if I’m scared, that’s exactly when I should jump.<\/strong> I don’t fully know why I believe this so strongly, but I do. Fear, for me, has always been a sign that something matters \u2014 that it’s worth doing precisely because it’s uncomfortable. If I wait until I “feel ready,” I’ll be waiting forever. Readiness is a myth I don’t chase anymore. I pay the money, I commit, and then I become<\/em> ready. That’s just how I’m wired.<\/p>\n

The Tipping Point<\/h3>\n

The actual moment I decided? It was after a vacation in January. I remember sitting with myself, post-holiday, in that reflective headspace you get into right before you go back to real life, and I just thought: I need to put myself one step higher. I can’t keep hovering at this level.<\/em><\/p>\n

And when I asked myself what that “one step higher” actually looked like, the answer was MFDS. Not because it was the easy option \u2014 it very much was not \u2014 but because it was the option that scared me enough to know it was the right one.<\/p>\n

So I signed up.<\/p>\n

Where I Was At, Looking Back<\/h3>\n

At that point, I was right at the start. I didn’t have a study plan yet. I didn’t know exactly how many hours a day I’d need to grind. I didn’t know if I’d cry over past papers at some point (spoiler: I did, more than once). What I did know was why<\/em> I was doing this \u2014 and looking back now, I think that’s the part that carried me through the exhausting nights that followed.<\/p>\n

If you’re sitting where I was back in December \u2014 turning the idea over in your head, wondering if you’re “ready,” wondering if you even have the time \u2014 I see you. My honest answer is: you’re probably not ready, and you probably don’t have the time you think you need. Sign up anyway. Let the fear do its job.<\/p>\n

Next episode, I’ll take you back to figuring out an actual study plan (and realising how much I underestimated<\/em> this exam \ud83d\ude05).<\/p>\n

Looking back, that leap was the best decision I made \u2014 but I didn’t know that yet. Until the next episode \u2014 here’s to jumping in scared.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Okay. So I’m actually doing this. I’m sitting here writing the very first entry of what I’m calling my MFDS Diaries, because if I’m going to put myself through this, I might as well document the chaos \u2014 the doubts, the late nights, the “why did I sign up for this” moments \u2014 and hopefully […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":510,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[9],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-505","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-dental"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/smilewithdrmel.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/07\/ChatGPT-Image-Jul-2-2026-at-10_05_51-AM.png","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/smilewithdrmel.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/505","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/smilewithdrmel.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/smilewithdrmel.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/smilewithdrmel.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/smilewithdrmel.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=505"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/smilewithdrmel.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/505\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":509,"href":"https:\/\/smilewithdrmel.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/505\/revisions\/509"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/smilewithdrmel.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/510"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/smilewithdrmel.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=505"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/smilewithdrmel.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=505"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/smilewithdrmel.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=505"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}